


What Makes Us

by ObsidianRomance



Series: Video 'verse [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Mpreg, Mpreg Dean, Wincest - Freeform, graphic birth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-10
Updated: 2014-01-10
Packaged: 2018-01-08 06:49:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1129595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObsidianRomance/pseuds/ObsidianRomance
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam and Dean's youngest son gets curious as to why a table had anything to do with his birth.<br/>Dean shows him the video evidence.  (Dean's POV)</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Makes Us

Dean loves that Erik is this weird combination of both his parents.

Personality wise, Erik is like a miniature version of Sam.  It’s actually a bit unnerving because Erik gives Dean weird flashbacks to when he had to drag Sam’s nose out of a book or how many times he rolled his eyes over how much Sam enjoyed school.  Erik is Sam, through and through.  Except, he looks nothing like Sam.  He’s got Dean’s looks, with the addition of a pair of black rimmed glasses that always manage to slip off his nose.

Erik’s smaller and a little skinnier than either of his parents were at his age but he hasn’t hit any type of growth spurt and Dean has to keep reminding him that he’ll grow, though he’ll probably never catch up with Colin.

Honestly, Erik’s conception was a surprise.  Since that moment, he hasn’t stop surprising his parents.

Dean knows his son is a prodigy.  The kid’s smart as hell and can probably blow everyone in his family away.  It makes Dean damn proud of the boy.  It also makes Erik his little pet project, in a sense.  He’ll never subject Erik to something he isn’t on board with but Erik jumps at the opportunity to learn more about the world his parents dabble in.  Dean spends quality time with all their kids but Erik is his baby and he’s doing a shitty job of cutting the cord.

So, whenever Erik feels up to it, Dean schools Erik in the world of the supernatural.  It’s only after Erik is done with his school work, much to the insistence of both Sam and Dean.  They escape to the bunker and spread out tons of books, letting Erik peruse them until his prodigy mind’s content.

Sam and Dean have never hidden any part of their lives from their kids except for the fact that they’re brothers.  They don’t go into details about their other relations, letting the kids find family in the friends they choose to surround themselves with.  Dean knows that maybe one day the kids will find out, but it will be a day in the future.  The trust about their parentage will be hard won.  It saddens Dean a bit; he knows the truth of that statement has everything to do with the fact that most of the people Sam and Dean would consider family are dead and have been for some time.

Aside from that lie, Sam and Dean made a pact to keep their kids safe.  Keeping them safe means making sure they understand all the things in the world that can hurt them; that list includes ghosts, demons, vampires, werewolves, and countless other beings.  Colin, Karlie, and Erik are aware of the life Sam and Dean lived and they know their parents still solve cases, only from a more behind the scenes role.  They have an impressive working knowledge on how to handle supernatural creatures and situations but Sam and Dean hope their kids will never actually have to use it.

Colin and Karlie are happy to read up on things and test their knowledge against their parents’.  Erik, however, devours the information with an appetite that impresses Dean.

He reaches out and ruffles his son’s hair out of habit, ignoring his son’s half-hearted attempt to swat him away.  Erik reaches over the table, his little thirteen year old body stretching far enough to snag a book on the opposite side.

“Hey, pop?”  Erik screws up his face and turns towards Dean.

“Hmm?”

“So, um, how are Jinn made?”  Erik pulls one leg up onto the seat of the chair and rests his chin on his knee.

“Jinn?”  Dean raises his eyebrows and thinks about how Jinn had been part of some of his more conflicted moments.  “They’re made from smokeless fire.”  He spins the book Erik is reading and flips a few pages before landing on a picture of such a flame.  “Sounds weird, I know, but sometimes there are some occurrences that we just can’t explain.”

Erik sighs.  “It’s so frustrating sometimes.  It’s like…there is no solid rule on things.”

“Tell me about it, kiddo.  You learn fast that there are no absolutisms when it comes to dealing with the bad guys.”  Dean smiles at Erik’s hang-up.  His son is always searching for a pattern or trying to whittle things down to a basic understanding.

“It’s not like…you know…how people are made or anything.”

That catches Dean off guard and he isn’t sure what to make of that statement.  “Yeah…”  He cocks his head at his son.

“You know…’cause…people are pretty easy to understand.  Like…I know how _I_ was made and stuff.”  Erik licks his lips and turns to face Dean, his eyes locking with an older identical pair.  He looks uncertain for a second, likes he’s building up his nerve.  He slides a finger up the slope of his nose and helps his glasses back to their rightful place.

“Yeah…you do know how you were made.”  Dean isn’t sure what Erik is fishing for so he shuts up and sits back.  Erik’s done a pretty good job of advocating for himself ever since he was a baby; Dean’s sure he’ll make his point clear soon.

Shrugging, Erik closes the book.  “Colin and Karlie told me they were born in this room.”

‘They were,” Dean states with a nod.  “You were too.”

 _“Why?”_ Erik asks with a scrunch to his nose.

“I dunno.”  It’s an honest answer.  Sam has asked him hundreds of times why he delivered all their kids in the library.  And, really, Dean can’t think of an answer other than the fact that it felt right.  He’d insisted on giving birth to their kids in the bunker, where they’d all be safe and surrounded by the closest thing to a home that they’d had in a long time.  When the time came, Dean just wanted to be somewhere comforting and the library filled that role.  Sam had gotten a little crazy at first, worried that Dean was making a mess of fluids near priceless books.  Then Sam got more crazy in worrying over Dean’s and their kids’ health.  He didn’t have to worry much.  Dean pushed their kids out quickly, letting memories and their first cries fill the library with more than books.

“You don’t know?”

“I don’t know Erik.  It just happened.  I just…It was like I couldn’t let any of you into the world until I felt I was somewhere safe.”

Erik thinks for a minute and makes a curt satisfied nod.  “ _Where_ , exactly, was I born?”

Dean doesn’t think on it too much.  He knows the answer.  It’s etched into his brain and he smiles at the thought.  Pointing to his right, he catches his son’s attention.  “Right there.”

“Next to the table?”

Dean snorts softly.  “The table helped.”

“What?”  Eyes wide, Erik looks at his father like he’s crazy.

“You wanna see?”  Dean’s always been honest with his kids.  He and Sam have never hidden anything involving their children’s births.  Usually, it’s Sam who gets caught up in the miracle of their sons’ and daughter’s births but sometimes Dean feels his heart exploding from the thought of it, especially when Erik is digging for answers.  “Dad recorded it.”

Erik thinks for a moment before nodding.  “Can I?”

“Yeah.  Come’ere.”  Sliding his chair back with a loud drag, Dean urges Erik to follow him, placing a gentle hand to the boy’s shoulder.  He swallows loudly and hopes showing Erik the video is a good idea.  The boy is mature for his age but Erik has always looked at Dean like Dean is some type of superhero and he doesn’t want anything to change that.  It’s not that he feels like less of a man because he gave birth to his kids.  It’s quite the opposite in fact.  He’s damn proud of that and thinks that there is nothing on earth that proves how strong more than those three birth videos Sam filmed.  It’s the most impressive thing he’s ever done.  He does, however, get a little uncomfortable seeing himself cry out in pain or get frantic.  All of his kids know that Dean carried them but it does spark discomfort in knowing that they’ve watched their births and seen a lot of up close and personal details about his anatomy.  It’s stupid and nothing to be ashamed of but it still makes him want to hide behind a wall of “I don’t care” and “stop watching that video.”

In minutes, he has Erik sitting next to him in one of the spare rooms.  Sam had set up the large television so it functions as a computer monitor.  Erik is the one who knows how to play the video Sam stored on an external hard drive; Dean doesn’t even pretend he can figure the thing out.  In minutes, Dean realizes he has hours of video to weed through before he gets to Erik’s actual birth.

He watches the video version of him and Sam interact at warp speed: Dean pacing away from Sam and his video camera, occasionally turning back to flip his brother the bird.  There was a lot of cursing and then asking for forgiveness.

Eventually, Dean ended up in the library, nude; his water broke all over the floor.  It came with a gasp and mad scramble to steady himself against a piece of furniture.

Sam rolled his eyes but didn’t say anything.  He mumbled something before heading off to gather some towels.

“Eww, pop.”  Erik covers his eyes with a hand but splays his fingers enough so that he can still watch.

He’s curious.  Dean can tell.  Erik leans closer and tilts his head to the right but still keeps his hand up like he’s trying to fool someone.

Fast forwarding some more, Dean watches himself grab onto the edge of the table and let out a deep groan.  Knees bent, he lowered into the squat to help ride out the contraction.  He gasped, mouth falling open as a punch of air left his lungs; his eyes stayed wide in pain.

Dean remembers how Erik took him by surprise.  In utero, Erik tended to do that.  He’d stay quiet for long stretches of time and then shocked Dean by landing right on a bundle of nerves and making Dean see stars.  At the end of Dean’s labor, Erik decided he was coming out on his own terms and he was in a rush.

On the video, Dean kept one hand on the table and one on the side of his belly, rubbing like he was in a trance.  He panted loudly, completely focused on what his body was doing.

Sam’s voice flooded the video.  “You okay?”

Dean shook his head from left to right.  “Now.  This is happening now.”  His eyes went wide again and he got down into a deeper squat, this time staying there.  He groaned and held onto the table for support as his whole body tensed in a push.  “Fuck.”

The focus of the video goes hazy for a moment then rattles around before settling and focusing once again.  Sam ran into the frame.  “You pushing?”

Dean answered with a “are you fucking kidding me” glare while growling through another push.  He bounced lower into his squat and kept huffing and puffing.  Every feature narrowed down to focusing on pushing and he strained to work Erik’s head out of his body.  “Can’t!  Oh god, Sam!  Can’t!”

“Yes you can.  I got you.”  Sam fell to his knees.  As soon as he was on the ground, Dean pitched forward, hooking his arms around Sam’s shoulders and letting his distended belly swing between them.  “Come on, Dean.  Push.”

“Pushing,” Dean snarled and put more of his weight on Sam.  He widened his legs and bore down.  “I’m too old for this.”

“Shut up.  You’re barely forty.  You’re doing great.”  Sam smiled and rested his forehead on Dean’s.  They kissed softly.

“Eww,” Erik says as he pauses the video.

“Eww?” Dean wants to tell his son that they haven’t even gotten to the “eww” part yet.  This is the pretty part, before all things involving the afterbirth.

“Yeah.  You and dad.  You…you always do _that_.”

Dean takes “that” to mean kissing and he almost bursts out laughing.  It’s hilarious that his son has hit a threshold where seeing his parents kissing is the grosses thing in the world.  He keeps quiet, though.  His son has a thick skin but he doesn’t want to make Erik feel like he isn’t listening to him.  “We don’t always do ‘that’.”

“Yes you do.  Just like that.  You always get really close like that.  You _made out_ when I was born?”  Erik scratches at the back of his neck.

“You could watch and find out.”

“Not if you’re just going to make out the _whole_ time.”

Dean knows there is probably ten minutes left of the video.  He remembers the way he felt in the moment paused on the screen.  He felt a little feral and hyper defensive at that moment.  He’s amazed he even let Sam touch him.  Oddly enough, his flight or fight mechanism kicked in for some reason and he wanted Erik out more than he wanted either of his two older children out.  “Relax, we’re not going to make out.  Plus, your sister and brother are in this part.”

That gets Erik intrigued and he pushes play.

The video plays and a naked little Karlie ran into the frame screaming her head off.  Colin was chasing behind her with a fistful of clothing.  Karlie did a weird wiggly dance in front of her parents.  “Look!  I’m naked like papa!  I can have a baby too!”

It’s hard to read the emotion on his face in the video but Dean remembers feeling like he wanted to die at that moment.  As much as he loves them, if he had some way of drawing runes on the ground and magically zapping his children somewhere else, he would have done so in a flash.  Colin was supposed to be watching his sister, a tough job for a seven year old considering that Karlie had a knack for escaping from him.  Dean wasn’t ready to shock his daughter with what having a baby really entailed and snapped at Sam.  “Get them out of here!”

Sam snapped into action, hooking Karlie around the waist in a football hold.  “Colin! Come!”  Their son bounced after Sam, complaining about how “Karlie is the worst sister in the world” and “always gets him in trouble.”  Sam’s out of the video for a moment, leaving Dean alone.

Not much happened in the video aside form Dean groaning.  Twice he repositioned his footing and once he threw his head back and whined through a push.  Eventually, Sam ran back into the room, getting on his knees in front of Dean and letting his brother loop his arms around his neck again.  “They’re good.  I put on a new movie.”

“‘Kay.”  Dean clamped onto Sam’s shoulder with one hand and used his other to cup the emerging sliver of skull between his legs.

Sam tried to do the same but Dean swatted him away quickly, snarling.

Dean remembers doing that and feeling a bit crazy while thinking he’d had everything in control.  He’d wanted to do everything himself, like he’d done when Colin was born.  With a rumbling yell, he got Erik’s whole head out after one determined push.

On the screen, he sees his face warp into something panicked and uncertain.

“Fuck, Sam!  The cord, it’s…”  Dean’s fingers worked over the baby’s head and searched out the alien feeling of the umbilical cord.

This time, Dean allowed Sam’s hands to help him.  He stayed low in his squat and returned both arms to their place around Sam’s neck, leaning all his weight into him.  Sam took it in stride.

Dean remembers how nervous he felt at that moment and how hard it was to not push.  So much trust was placed in Sam hands, the type of trust Dean could never give to anybody else.  That thought alone fans a spark of emotion growing in Dean’s mind.  He loves Sam more than he’s ever loved anyone and that type of love has only become a solid fiber of his very existence. 

With complete dedication to the task at hand, video Sam somehow found a way to stay calm.  “It’s okay Dean.”  Sam hooked his fingers under the cord and worked it over the baby’s head.  “It’s okay.  It’s not wrapped around tightly.  I got it.  You can push.”

Dean listened.  He held onto Sam and buried his face in his brother’s neck.   As if frozen that way, he kept growling into Sam’s neck with each push.  The angle made it difficult for Sam to get a clear visual on what was going on between Dean’s legs.

“Dean, lean back.  I can’t see what I’m doing.”

“No…I…”  Dean pushed hard.  “ _I_ know what _I’m_ doing.  I know…fuck!  Catch.”

Thankfully, Sam did.  The video shows Erik enter the world in a rush of fluid, straight into Sam’s waiting arms.  Sam swung him up between their bodies, pressing Erik belly down against his own chest and pulling Dean closer.  Dean slumped forward, laughing between pants of air as the baby startled alive and wailed.

“Holy shit,” Dean gasped as he looked down at his new son.  “Hi, little one.”  Each word was staggered with loud attempts to catch his breath.  He traced the outline of the baby’s ear and wiped away mucus from his face.

Sam pulled back enough to see Erik fully.  “‘Nother boy.”  Closing the gap between them again, Sam and Dean worked to support Erik and keep him safely sandwiched between their chests.  “God, you’re so awesome.”  He smirked at Dean and kissed his forehead.

Dean smiled and let his head come to rest on Sam’s shoulders.  Completely spent, his movements were languid but he laughed again when Erik cried louder.  “Okay, okay, we hear you.”

Watching the video makes Dean realize how much he loves that sound, the sound of his baby’s first breath and subsequent wail.  He loves it even now, listening to it on a video that can’t possibly portray how powerful hearing Erik for the first time really was.  It’s still powerful, though.  He still feels the tugging at his heart and the longing in his body to scoop his baby up and snuggle him close.  Only, Erik isn’t much of a baby anymore.  Still, Dean knows his eyes probably look a little too shimmery for anyone to believe he’s not affected by the video.

“My head’s all messed up.” Erik states as he abandons the video and uses both hands to explore the perfectly normal curve of his skull.

Dean laughs.  His son just watched his own birth and _that_ is the only thing he comes away from the video with.  “It’s not really messed up.  It went back to being round after a while.  You kinda had to…”  Dean pauses and rubs at one eye with the back of his hand.  “Had to squeeze you through a tight area.  It’s normal.”  Dean messes with Erik’s hands and roughs up his hair a bit.  “Though I would’ve loved you even if you were a cone head.  Would have bought you all those long knit hats they sell with the pom-pom on the end.”  With a smile, Dean tickles the baby fat that’s been thinning out around Erik’s middle.

Erik dissolves into a fit of giggles, falling onto his back against the couch’s seat and surrendering to his father’s tickle torture.  “Pop!”  He lets out a laugh on a gasp for air.  “Pop!  Stop!”  Words become useless as he keeps laughing and tries to curl into a ball and defend himself.  “I surrender!  I surrender!”

Dean lets up and Erik composes himself, righting his glasses and coming to sit next to his father again.  “Pop?”

“Hmm?”

“Did it…you know…hurt?”  Erik gestures towards the video that has long gone silent on the last scene of Sam and Dean fawning over their new son.

“Yeah.  Hurt a lot but that’s not your fault.”

“No, I…I know that…just…”  Erik bites his lip and hesitates for a moment.  In a split second, he launches himself at Dean and throws his arms around him.  It’s so sudden that Dean rocks backwards from the momentum of the embrace and makes a noise of surprise before wrapping his arms around Erik.  Erik’s grip gets tighter, his face buried in the fabric of Dean’s shirt.

“Woah, hey, you okay, Erik?”  Dean runs a hand through his hair.

“Yeah…I…Just…thank you.”  He pauses for a moment.

Dean’s not sure what to make of that.  His son doesn’t have to thank Dean for giving birth to him.  That sounds crazy.  It is, however, sweet and he feels his eyes getting wet all over again.  “Erik…”

“Thanks for being my pop.  Thanks for taking care of me and making sure no one and nothing ever messes with me.  You’re the strongest person I know.  I wanna be just like you.”  Erik is still holding on tightly.  “I love you, pop.”

The words finally send tears over Dean’s cheeks.  Their kids aren’t shy about showing affection and Sam and Dean aren’t shy with telling Colin, Karlie, and Erik how much they mean to them, but the earnest nature to Erik’s words touch Dean so deeply that he can barely talk.  It’s terrifying that Erik wants to be like him but it’s also the most profound thing anyone has ever said to him.  “Love…Love you too, Erik.”  He kisses Erik’s head and lets his lips rest there.  The pure love he feels for Erik is so strong that Dean’s almost drowning in it.  He feel like a cliché, but he’s never felt anything like the love he has for his kids.  And Erik?  Erik’s always found a way to intensify their perfect bond like neither of their other kids have.  With another kiss, one firm enough for him to feel the curve at the top of his son’s skull, he smiles.  “See, perfectly normal round head.”

Erik laughs, pulling out of the hug.

They have a moment where they both don’t speak and try to figure out how to deal with the awkward aftershocks of such an emotional show of their parent-son bond.

“Hey,” Sam says as he enters the room with two take out cups of coffee in hand.  “I was looking for you two.”  He cocks an eyebrow at Dean, realizing a moment too late that he just interrupted something.  “I can go…”

“I’mma go clean up my books,” Erik says, hurrying out of the room.  As he passes Sam, he lets out a quick, “hi, dad” and scurries into the library.

Sam plops down beside Dean, handing him a cup of coffee.  He takes in the video on the television and the heartfelt look in Dean’s eyes.  “I interrupt something?”

“No we…Erik just wanted to see his birth video.”  Dean licks his lips and takes a swig of his coffee.  It’s hot and perfect and he can’t stop a satisfied sigh from leaving his mouth.

“You were crying,” Sam states with utmost confidence.

“Was not.”

“Were too.”  Sam smiles around the edge of his coffee cup and takes a sip.

“Yeah, well…” Letting the words drop off, Dean shrugs and covers the discomfort he is feeling in being found out by drinking his coffee.

“What’d he think?”  Sam turns his whole body to face Dean.

“Erik?”

“Yeah.”

“I dunno.  I think he was more excited to get ammunition to tease Karlie with.”

They both share a laugh.

“Aww, her cute little butt.  She was too adorable for her own good.  God, she’s so big now,” Sam says, his voice heavy with remembrance and sentiment.

“Yeah well, I wanted to kill her cute little butt at that moment.”  Dean laughs and realizes Sam is crowding his space.  He clears his throat and smirks.  “Erik thought I was pretty awesome for giving birth to him.”

“You are pretty awesome.”  Sam knocks his forehead against Dean’s and lingers there for a moment before catching Dean’s lips.

Dean lets out an amused snort and smiles against the pressure from Sam’s lips.  He thinks of how Erik teased him earlier and realizes that he and Sam _do_ always end up this way.  They tend to share space and air without even realizing it. “Sam?”

“Yeah?”

“I was crying.”  Dean has no idea why he feels the need to say that, but for some reason he wants to make it absolutely clear to Sam that he gets worked up over his children’s existence as well.

Laughing, Sam kisses him again.  “ _I know_.”

“Well, I just…I love how big they are getting but I _hate_ how big they’re getting.”  Dean realizes he sounds like a crazy person.  “Sometimes I like to remember they were small.”

“Me too.”  Sam kisses him softly before repeating, “me too.”  With a mischievous laugh, Sam pulls away and cues up the video again.  “I wanna remember your face when you heard him for the first time.”

Dean doesn’t fight.  He shakes his head slowly but it’s without any real commitment to the action and he knows Sam understands that they feel the same way.  He also knows that while their family has many happy moments ahead of them, there are also moments worth replaying.

He’s still going to pretend it was all Sam’s idea.


End file.
